A hot girl state of mind
Can’t talk rn, I’m doing hot girl shit and by hot girl shit I mean having covid :(
Thanks to so many people reaching out with kind words and encouragement! I’m overwhelmed by your generosity but just a little bit off kilter because of the covid, so let’s gooo
🩺 Social media mental health breaks
With three teen daughters in the household, I’m very aware of Tom Holland’s social media pause. In the words of Zendaya’s boyfriend himself:
I have taken a break from social media for my mental health because I find Instagram and Twitter to be overstimulating, to be overwhelming. I get caught up and I spiral when I read things about me online. And ultimately, it’s very detrimental to my mental state so I decided to take a step back and delete the app.
Despite whatever drama prompted the break, Holland’s use of the term “mental health” and his honest description of what it feels like is a big deal. In a world where it’s estimated that 40% of men are unwilling to talk about their mental health, a celebrity taking a social media pause can have an impact.
The relationship between mental health and social media use continues to be the subject of heated debate, especially when it comes to teens. In one moment, we can’t get enough of “tech-savvy” teens who gleefully cast aside the olds, whether by declaring the side-part dead on TikTok or flocking to new platforms like BeReal. In the next moment, we worry that social media is ruining an entire generation.
There’s no shortage of earnest articles on how we should be worried about teen girls on social media, or academic studies about how social media use increases mental distress in teens. or think tanks wondering how to hold tech companies accountable. While social scientists continue to do more and better research on the topic, actual teens on social media are finding their own ways to address mental health.
🚶🏽♀️Hot-girl walks as the new mindfulness
The hashtag #HotGirlWalk started popping up on TikTok early last year and it’s maintained a steady momentum ever since. The benefits of walking aren’t new or surprising. Walking makes you feel happier. It’s good for your heart. It’s a brief respite from scrolling through Elon Musk’s Twitter. However, TikToker Mia Lind, who takes credit for the term “hot-girl walk”, has said the hot-girl walk is as much about mental and emotional wellbeing as it is about physical exercise.
In her explainer video, Lind flashes before and after photos of herself, but she goes on to explain that the daily hour-long walk is not just about a physical transformation. It’s what you do during the walk that matters, she says. You’re only allowed to think about three things:
Things you’re grateful for
Your goals and how you’re going to achieve them
How hot you are
If you begin to think about relationship drama or get into a negative headspace, she advises turning up the volume on your music playlist (she has a playlist) to drown it out.
Think of it as adopting a walk persona, but instead of inhabiting a botanist looking for a rare plant species or a landscape painter seeking out new inspiration (or am I the only one that does this?), you are inhabiting your best self. That mindful walk in nature improves sleep quality, can improve your mental health, and is a beginner-friendly workout. And in Lind’s own words, “You take that energy and you carry it with you throughout the whole day.”
How did robots get so many emotions?
This week Chinese tech giant Xiaomi revealed work on a humanoid robot called CyberOne that is able to detect 45 human emotions!!! And I have so many questions.
How does CyberOne do it, when we know most emotional artificial intelligence can only detect those 6 debatable universals? Is it because it can detect 85 environmental cues too? Does it pick up on multiple modalities like face, gesture, and voice? And what does it do once it’s detected whatever these 45 emotions might be? We may never know the answers since it’s probably all trade secrets locked up as tightly as the secrets of the human heart. Plus, Gartner has decided that emotion AI has reached peak hype cycle, which usually translates to maturity or obscurity.
The bigger question might be this: can most humans detect 45 emotions? Even with the proliferation of empaths in recent years, I wonder whether CyberOne has something to teach us.
Friday Feeling > Hot Girl
🔑 DEFINITION
A state of mind that embodies unapologetic confidence through self-affirming behavior.
See also: Self-care, that girl, main character energy
📜 A BRIEF HISTORY
Since the middle ages, hot has been a common metaphor for burning with desire. But it was in the 1990s, that hot girl entered the pop culture vernacular, usually referring to someone who was not only sexually attractive but also unattainable.
Along the way, hot girl became a negative label for women deemed to be ditzy, high maintenance, or promiscuous. The label was associated with pornography (and not in a body-positive way), as in the 2015 Netflix documentary Hot Girls Wanted. A hot mess, which first surfaced in the 2000s, is someone who is all over the place, maybe a literal mess or someone who is always in crisis, but still sexy. By the 2010s, hot girl was more about dragging people down.
The negative connotations of hotness flipped in 2019, when rapper Megan Thee Stallion released the song “Hot Girl Summer”. The song preached that hotness was more a state of mind than specific physical attributes. Hot girls were unapologetically self-confident, shattering the deep-seated expectations placed on women. There’s an element of third-wave feminism in Stallion’s message, too, with a less homogeneous set of expectations for people who identify as women.
As hot girl summer continued into fall, the internet took another phrase from Megan Thee Stallion and turned it into a meme. The “I Can’t Talk Right Now, I’m Doing Hot Girl Shit” is a performance of a mock phone call (old school style with thumb and pinky out, not how Gen Z’s have modified the gesture), telling the person on the other end “I can’t talk right now” because “I’m doing hot girl shit.” The video then cuts to the same person performing most banal moment—shaving their upper lip, eating spaghetti, savoring the last few puffs of a joint, or taking a nap.
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In 2021, hot-girl walks emerged as a way to build self-confidence through goal-setting and gratitude. Like so many internet emotions, hot girl can be used ironically too where people declare “real hot girls” wear trucker hats or have visible tan lines. In 2022, hot girl is a mood, a vibe, a type of energy, and a state of mind that exudes confidence and normalizes the idea that everyone can be hot.
💬 EXPRESSION
The phrase “I can’t talk right now, I’m doing hot girl shit” works in two ways:
To convey the hot girl state of mind, when you’re feeling confident just going about your life
To create a hot girl state of mind by intentionally taking steps to feel more confident
💗 EXPERIENCE
Anyone, be it man, woman or non-binary folks can experience the feeling of being a hot girl. The hot girl knows she’s hot because she’s confident in who she is and knows how to enjoy herself without worrying about what others around her think. So the hot girl state of mind is also a feeling of liberation, taking back ownership of the meaning of the word.
❝ QUOTE
“Confidence literally starts with yourself. You have to go look in the mirror at yourself and if you don’t like what you see, you’re going to give off that energy.” Megan Thee Stallion
💡 BIG PICTURE
The hot girl trend started as a relatable way for people to take control of the entire concept of what qualifies as hot. The idea continues to evolve into a more empathetic and inclusive way of building confidence and connecting with others over the not-so-great moments of day-to-day existence.
Hot girl is ultimately a state of mind that taps into positive emotions, like gratitude, bravery, confidence, and joy, and can be harnessed for whatever purposes you see fit.
🤔 LEARN MORE
Watch Megan Thee Stallion’s Girls in the Hood video with the line that started it all—“real hot girl shit”
Learn how the hot girl meme challenges the male gaze in Vice
Read Danya Isssawi’s discussion of the social media movement that is “hot girl” in The New York Times
Try listening to these self-affirming podcasts on your next hot girl walk
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Me: Can’t talk right now, I’m doing hot girl shit
Also me:
Stay well, everyone!
xoxo
Pamela 💗